Why hello, hello! So good to see you! I'm simply delighted you could drop by.
What's that? Oh! My goodness, but where are my manners? Please, come in, come in - you must be bored to pieces; it's frightfully tedious out there today, wouldn't you say? No, no, leave your shoes on, it's quite alright. We stand on neither decorum nor socks here, as I like to say. Besides, I'm sure you can't be staying for long - the real world beckons, it always beckons, and we can only resist its call for so long, can't we? No, I'm certain you've just popped in to escape this recent spell of monotony for a short while (positively dreadful, isn't it, the forecasters are even saying a bout of ennui isn't out of the question for tomorrow), and then it's back to work. No, I quite understand. Our fine establishment caters to all sorts of upstanding procrastinators just like yourself. Please, take a look around.
What's that you say? No, indeed, not much content as of yet. You see, we've only opened very recently. Today, in fact. Why, now that you've brought it to mind, I believe you have the very proud distinction of being our first patron. I do hope you find everything to be satisfactory. It's so very important to get off on the right foot, don't you agree? After all, we may not look like much now, but from humble beginnings, as they say.
But I do go on. Surely you must have questions for me. Please, ask away - for why else am I here, if not to answer the questions of our loyal customers?
What's that? When do we expect more content? Ah, truly a piercing question, my friend; you have driven straight to the heart of the matter. I can see already that we've succeeded in attracting a more intelligent clientele than most! Regrettably, I can offer no guarantees to you; I'm afraid such things are always fraught with unknowns. Nevertheless, I have been told by my supplier to expect new posts every week or so. Not the most frantic of schedules, I don't hesitate to admit, but naturally we insist on only the very best in terms of quality, and such things, as I'm sure you're aware, take time. Although I should mention, now that your most insightful of questions has put us on the topic, we are on the lookout for additional suppliers. Just a supplementary post here and there, as it were, to fill in any unforeseen gaps in supply that might arise. Perhaps you know someone who might be interested?
Gracious, look at me! I aimed to take you in out of the tedium, and here I go boring you myself. No, no, there's no need to deny it; I can see it in your eyes. I won't keep you another minute. I insist! Here, let me get the door for you. Oh my, if it isn't dull out there! I want you to make certain you don't go too far without stopping again to look at something interesting, I won't have you catching the doldrums on my account. I do believe YouTube has an outlet not far from here; I've found they provide excellent protection against the kind of work you have to do.
What's that you say? Oh, you're far too kind; indeed, it is I who should be thanking you. Nevertheless, I will accept your compliments, undeserved though they may be, in hopes that I will see you again soon. Pardon me? You'll be back soon? Oh, splendid! Well, I look forward to your return with great anticipation. I only hope that our humble content, when it finally arrives, can live up to your lofty expectations.
Well, I can see that you must be off, don't tarry on my account! I'm so unspeakably glad you were able to drop by, do be sure to visit again when you have the time. What's that? Thank you again? Yes, well thank you again, and good day to you!
Oh, and do be sure to consider contributing!